Why I'm speaking up!

Updated: May 31, 2022

Hi there,

Welcome to my blog where I talk all things menopause especially for black African women.

Menopause, certainly, something not spoken about openly, especially where I come from. Taboos and myths tightly guard it. Most of those who have experienced it do so in silence, carrying on with life #businessasusual. But I'm sorry, when this tornado hit me, I fell hard, flat on my back, into a deep and dark pit. After my difficult experience, the one thing I could not do was keep quiet about menopause, despite the thick cloud of silence surrounding it. Surely someone in my family, community, or church, surely someone can tell me something, anything, so I thought. What manner of thing…curse is this? How does one get up? How does one survive it? The devil is a liar! I declared – this must be a curse from the pit of hell! The devil is stealing my mind, My spiritual warrior mode kicked in, and I was ready to spit fire back at the devil.

Listen, being me during my menopause transition has not been easy, and in this blog, I invite you to journey with me as I try to understand and explain what has been and is going on. One of the things that I have come to understand is that the way I have experienced and responded to my menopause was influenced by many factors that make me who I am – hence #myblackmenopause. Hence #KeturaWoman.

To my African sisters, walk with me. Let's talk about this menopause – our future wellbeing and happiness depend on it. I want to explore it more - after all knowledge is power. When we get knowledge we understand and when we couple that with support and encouragement, we become empowered to live and thrive beyond menopause. So let's be intentional about getting out there and breaking the silence, busting the myths that have kept generations of our mothers and grandmothers bound in a culture of silence whilst suffering and wasting away slowly. We should no longer sit back and accept that it is what it is, its old age, or the order of things. It's time to speak up. Menopause is a word so often surrounded by shame and embarrassment, whispered about due to its negative connotations. If the education system all over the world teaches about the menstrual cycle and reprodution system, why not the menopause. Every woman goes through the menopause, if they live long enough.

It's time to move forward.

It is time to take our health into our hands.

It is up to us to change the narrative.

Ketura, the name of the blog and support group, is a Hebrew name meaning fragrance/incense and sacrifice. I believe the name ably describes our mothers and grandmothers and the legacy of love, nurturing spirit and wisdom they leave. They also, throughout their lifetime, sacrifice so much for their loved whilst carrying and spreading a special aura of warmth and security. When we enter this season of our lives, we want to be worthy Ketura women carrying this beautiful fragrance wherever we go. The name Ketura is also very personal to me as it was my mother's name.

Menopause is real. Let's be intentional about getting out there and breaking this culture of silence. This blog site is dedicated to bringing awareness, information, guidance, and support on all things menopause, with a special emphasis on African and black women. Why? Because that's who I am, and that's what I know best – that is my life, experience, and journey. Some information, of course, is generic and applies to women of all nationalities, but some things will apply specifically to us because of culture, tradition, and colour.

My sisters and menotribe, in this season where you are transitioning into menopause, you will need as much support as you can get. So join this meno - sister and lets learn together. Forewarned is forearmed. Don't stumble into menopause; step in gracefully (if you can) fully empowered. For those who stumbled in like myself, its time to grab a hold of a sister's hand and allow yourself to be loved and supported. There is life still to be lived.

What is menopause?

Menopause is when your periods stop due to lower hormone levels. This usually happens between the ages of 45 and 55. It can sometimes happen earlier naturally. Or for reasons such as surgery to remove the ovaries (oophorectomy) or the uterus (hysterectomy), cancer treatments like chemotherapy, or a genetic reason. (Courtesy of NHS)

Research has shown that the average age of menopause in the UK is 52, and often women start to experience symptoms of hormonal change in their early 40s. Now for black women, its different, a research by the Study of Women's Health Across the Nation (SWAN), shows that Black women reach menopause at 49, two years earlier than the national median age. It also appears that Black women spend more time in the menopause transition than white women do.

Finally, I say again that knowledge is power! So here's us learning and breaking free from ancient taboos and living our best lives. Cheers!